The Vampires of Venice review [Toby Whithouse]

After being assaulted by Amy Pond, the Doctor takes her and Rory to Venice in 1580 to rekindle their love. Unfortunately, there are vampires about.
The Doctor's Case:

• A Good Quotation:
• "I'm from Ofsted."
• "Venice 1580". The opening scene is a good one, with Helen McCrory making an instant impression as Rosanna Calvierri. She is perhaps not the most memorable of Doctor Who's evil ladies but is one of the most interesting villains of series 5. She begins the scene as a noble, well-spoken and reserved lady, but once Isabella's father has gone she and Francesco circle the girl like predatory animals. We learn that she is working for the survival of her species - she doesn't want to take over the world, just a single city for the Saturnynes to make their home. Committing suicide at the end so that the Doctor has the blood of one more extinct species on his hands is poignant and the ultimate revenge. This would have been that much more effective, though, if the Daleks were still extinct. Her scenes with the Doctor are probably the best of the episode.
• The reasoning behind the Saturnynes seeming to be vampires (having no reflection and such) are all clever.
• The episode wasn't filmed in Venice but you wouldn't have guessed - the scenery is beautiful. The Doctor does a bit of world-building by giving some history on the city, which is always a good thing and deepens what could just be a way of having alliteration in the title.
• Matt Smith does another wonderful job as the Doctor, expressing his quiet anger at Rosanna and shouting at Amy with far more conviction than in The Beast Below or Victory of the Daleks. He decided to destroy the House of Calvierri stone by stone not because Rosanna killed Isabella, but because she didn't know her name. 

The Valeyard's Case:

• A Bad Quotation:
• "Yours is bigger than mine."
• "Cab for Amy Pond."
• "Something touched my leg! It's all around me!" This isn't Big Finish, Whithouse.
• "Fish from space have never been so... buxom."
• "We! Are! VENETIAN!"
• The opening credits should have begun as Isabella screamed. The following scene with Rory's stag isn't funny. The Doctor bursting out of the cake, the diabetic stripper stood outside, the Doctor saying that Amy's a good kisser... None of it lands. In fact, most of the humour throughout the episode fails. Additionally, the message that Rory leaves Amy is heart-breaking given that she was forcing herself on the Doctor at the end of the last episode.
• Amy doesn't seem remotely remorseful, embarrassed or ashamed for trying to sleep with the Doctor. "She kissed me because I was there," the Doctor says, claiming that it would have been Rory had he been there. That's clearly not what happened at the end of Flesh and Stone, though. It wasn't a kiss of passion and relief but what might be considered sexual assault if their sexes were reversed. This episode does nothing to redeem her.
• "You know what's dangerous about you? It's not that you make people take risks, it's that you make them want to impress you. You make it so they don't want to let you down. You have no idea how dangerous you make people to themselves when you're around." Has that ever really been the case? With Amy, perhaps, and later with Clara but we've never gotten that impression before. 
• The sonic screwdriver can heal wounds now? How many more miraculous functions will the screwdriver get?
• The resolution is too easy, ending with a simple flicking of a switch. There was very little tension or sense of jeopardy, with Francesco already dead and no one trying to stop the Doctor.

I'll Explain Later:

• What was with the silence at the end of the episode? It's eerie, certainly, but with hindsight this meant absolutely nothing. The Silence want to stop the Doctor from saying his name at Trenzalore. That's why they're called the Silence. They aren't world-destroyers.
• Why are the Saturnynes of the belief that they fled the Silence? They fled the cracks in time. The Silence should have no reason to wipe out Saturnyne.

This Reminds Me:

• The Doctor goes climbing at the climax again. (Logopolis, The Idiot's Lantern, Evolution of the Daleks)

The Inquisitor's Verdict: Yes, the storyline continuing from the end of Flesh and Stone is terrible and Amy has gone from being uninteresting and a poor audience surrogate to being reprehensible and a poor human being, and yes, the comedy almost never works, but otherwise the episode was decent enough. Matt Smith had another handful of standout moments, Helen McCrory gave an excellent performance and the costumes and faux-Venice were wonderful. The episode has many flaws but I award it the grade of C.

Doctor Who (Series 5)
The Time of Angels/Flesh and Stone  |  The Vampires of Venice  |  Amy's Choice