Living Legend review [Scott Gray]

"Did you notice those devices attached to their belts? The ones that resemble guns."
"Yes. What are they?"
"Guns."

The Plot: The world faces imminent destruction when Italy wins the World Cup! Can the fabled Time Lady Charleyostiantayshius save humanity from the dreaded Threllip Empire, or will her idiot assistant, the Doctor, ruin everything?

The Doctor's Case: November 2003, a month that commemorated the fortieth year since An Unearthly Child was broadcast on BBC TV one Saturday. Doctor Who was kept alive by Big Finish - as well as the books and comics - which took the Eighth Doctor from the very American world of the TV film, paired him up with a wonderfully English companion and continued the Doctor's adventures. A cliff-hanger in June 2002 had fans on their toes for eighteen months as they awaited the anniversary story, Zagreus. It was a mess.

Living Legend was free with Doctor Who Magazine, on a disc containing a documentary for Zagreus and is, in many ways, far better. It's a very short story at only 22 minutes but doesn't try to be anything other than what it is - a bit of fluff, and a welcome bit after a relatively poor run of Eighth Doctor stories. Neverland was an epic but when was the last time we got to see the Doctor and Charley have fun and enjoy themselves? The Stones of Venice? It's a refreshing change of pace and a reminder, if one's needed, of how delightful Paul McGann and India Fisher can be together when given the opportunity.

The story is effectively a sketch. The Threllips (with their Bristolian accents) are setting up a portal that will unleash an army upon Earth and are met by the Doctor, a humble transcriber, and the Most Exalted Time Lady Charleyostiantayshius, a hilarious parody of the ridiculously long names of some Time Lords. The Doctor and Charley are quick on their feet and defeat them through flattery, getting them drunk, telling them that World Cup Fever is contagious causing an argument between the two. There's never any threat but that's not important. It's just a fun listen.

The Valeyard's Case: It's difficult to imagine the Threllips conquering one planet, let alone several.

The Best Bit: Whenever Charley is pretending to be a Time Lord. A favourite exchange is: "You must feel very fortunate to work so closely with such a great figure." / "Oh, yes. I often wonder what I did to deserve it."

The Databank:

• The Doctor says that he hasn't seen celebrations on the same scale as the 1982 World Cup since VE (Victory in Europe) Day.

The Timeline: There isn't very much to go on, but it must be set between Charley's first trip in Sword of Orion and Neverland.

From Your Past... or Future: Lucie Miller would later claim that the Doctor was her bumbling assistant in Immortal Beloved. 

The Inquisitor's Judgement: Living Legend is a tiny story that's easy to overlook or forget about and hardly sets the world on fire. For a pair that endures a number of weak stories early on, has their relationship practically fall apart and require rebuilding, it's a welcome reminder of how fun the Eighth Doctor and Charley can be. It's never going to end up on anyone's Top 10 lists but it is what it is - 22 minutes of Paul McGann and India Fisher showing off their chemistry and making us laugh, showing that the Doctor Who universe isn't always bleak or tedious. Sometimes, the Doctor and his companion just get to have fun, and so do we. A